Sunday, May 31, 2009


MsRose1754 (11:39:44 PM): you don't know french
ERNZ0A (11:39:56 PM): i know how to kiss in french
MsRose1754 (11:41:06 PM): you have a way with words
ERNZ0A (11:41:20 PM): i'm a wizard of the word, that's what you heard, and anything else is quite absurd
ERNZ0A (11:41:22 PM): -Run DMC

Saturday, May 30, 2009

waiting for inspiration

"you guys are all so dreadfully ugly."

Friday, May 29, 2009


I am what exists in your smile.
I am a fury of words.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

hard to see

ERNZ0A (10:40:33 PM): it's easy to live in the moment
ERNZ0A (10:40:38 PM): it's hard to escape the future

last week

I felt the tension disappear in the warmth of afternoon. Sitting had never been so easy. Shaking out the little bits of turf from my shoe, for once I did not consider where each had been or what it had seen. For once, I was my own foreground and it was good to be alive and warm. My subconscious was not dying without all my focus and attention, but rather gaining strength from a long, indefinite period of rest while I took pleasure in the senses and scenes around me. Words became cramped then, and needed room to breathe as well. I saw a face that belonged to me and could name it. I was alive and in love and the teacher whose first name no one knew declared, "It's a love-life day."

what not to do at the register

how to be the best customer you can be:
1. Buy fresh basil. Lots of basil. But put it in a second bag so you don’t flood the belt with goopy herby water. And if you complain about your own goopy herby water, you need more sexting in your life, I guess. It's a shame you have to ruin something so wonderful with your own mediocrity as a person.
2. Buy interesting things for my attention span.
3. Your food items may not be particularly interesting to me, and your life even less so. Do not come visit unless you are sure I like you.
4. I understand that there may be an emergency and your offensive ring tone may be overly tempting, but if you take out the cell phone and proceed to talk on it while going through checkout, I will not be afraid to announce that I need a price check on your adult diapers so that your lover on the other end may or may not hear it. Worse than cell phones are those obscene BlueTooth headsets that just make you look and talk like an ass.
5. If Sam’s Club is so much better, don’t tell us about it; shop there instead. No one is stopping you. Additionally, know the name of the store in which you're shopping. Don't give the wrong store card and casually laugh it off as if you're not going to hell.
6. Refrain from waving your value card in our faces, plopping it onto the belt and making us sift through your endless collection of key chains to find it, or asking to borrow a “store card.” The store makes the card for exclusive purposes; we can’t go throwing them around liberally and trusting that everyone deserves value.
7. Once the register opens, you’re done. Don’t suddenly decide you have the change. If I were a mathematician I would have done something a lot cooler than work at a supermarket.
8. If the back of your value card is blank, and you know for a fact that it is impossible to read, don’t give it to us and expect a miracle. Give a phone number.
9. If your personality or facial features do not give you away, there is no way of telling that you are from the 609 area code. A telephone number is ten digits, give the whole thing.
10.Yes, we know that the tip of the signing pen on register seven is broken off, and yes it is still usable. If you cut all your fingernails, you would still have working fingers, correct? I know you’re dying to make yourself useful, but it’s common sense.
11. Bag your own groceries and we will make you a shrine.
12. If you’re not in the system by telephone number, face it: no one likes you. Go to customer service and get a new card, and don’t whine when we call the service desk for you to get you a number so you can save your thirty-nine cents.
13. If after all that seeking for a new value card number (because you know for a fact that you need it because something is on sale), nothing actually turns out to be on sale, you are a failure.
14. Learn how to add eighty cents over and over again if you really like yogurt. Yogurt is, and will always be, eighty cents. Don’t even think about arguing that it scanned differently.
15. Just because I work here doesn’t mean I know anything about the store. Customer service was invented for your insignificant queries.
16. It’s really not worth the effort to put all your groceries on the belt and then suddenly realize you forgot your reusable bags and run all the way back to your car to get them while we’re ringing you up just so you can save four cents a bag. Just think logically. And your own plastic bags from other stores are not reusable bags and you never deserved those four cents anyway.
17. Who buys obscure produce? If you put an unidentified vegetable on the belt and walk away, at least know what it is so it can be scanned. I don’t have all the answers, unfortunately.
18. Sometimes things go wrong. Be patient, I have to deal with one hundred of you a day. Don’t just get all offended because your scallops are ringing up the wrong way and storm out of the store without having bought anything.
19. “Hi, how are you.” It’s a nice little greeting. I don’t care if you just found your significant other is really some alien being sent to spy on the human race and is incapable of loving, just say you’re well and ask me and I’ll answer the same and we can get somewhere. Don’t ignore the question altogether and throw your items onto the belt if I’m taking my effort to greet you. Maybe I really really care about your personal well-being.
20. Be nice to your kids, it makes us feel happy and young inside. If your kids are annoying and shout the names of political figures over and over again, then it’s okay to slap them across the face and shut them up. Bring babies, quiet babies. And bring kids who are actually cute.
21. We do have some stupid rules. Don’t tell us they’re stupid. Just buy your novelty ice cream and take the discount and have a nice day.
22. If you see the cashier is standing there with a blank face ready for a customer, do not ask if his or her register is open. Again, common sense can brighten someone’s day.
23. Conversely, if you see the cashier is counting money or something to that effect, do not throw your items on the belt. You will fail miserably at your life for the next five minutes.
24. Anything in red on the screen means it is the price being taken off your purchase because of a sale. Do not ask questions. Indulge in the pleasure of seeing the red numbers.
25. Don’t get crazy about the coupons. It’s not worth the effort to ask all those questions if you are trying to get twenty cents off your purchase. If you really need the money to make your life less pathetic, calmly tell me in person and I will gladly help you out after my shift.
26. Speak English, please.
27. The gallons of milk go straight to the lower back. It may be amusing to watch us bag your eight gallons of it, but we also do that for everyone else for five hours. Do it yourself. Same goes for watermelons. Suck it up.
28. We are nice enough to bag your disgusting items. Do not then complain that something is too heavy or too light. Your bags are perfect, as we learn every day to be the best baggers we can be. Submit to this fact.
29. Don’t be the annoying regular who asks us every day if Miley Cyrus has been to the store today. This doesn’t even make sense.
30. Do not tell your child to give his candy bar to the “lady” or the “woman.” A teenage girl is a “girl.”
31. Yes, we have name tags, but it’s creepy to call us by the name on it, unless we actually know each other.
32. Don't hand us a big sheet of coupons. Make yourself a little bit useful and instead of using circumlocution when we ask you to cut them and hand them to us, just take the tiny bit of effort to rip them off.
33. Coupons are to be used in moderation, so don't try to make any excuse to use all of them at once or trick us. As Will said in Shakespeare in Love, don't give it all away at once.
34. Buy roasted chicken. Who doesn't want to smell that?
35. Okay, your best friend from third grade, neighbor, college roommate, or scandalous love affair does not give you an excuse talk or scream "OHMYGODHIIIII [and so on]" through your checkout. Calmly acknowledge said acquaintance with dignity, then when you're done checking out you may talk to one another. I'm not excited, so why should you be?
36. Wait your turn. Don't shove things in my face prematurely.
37. Be happy. You are having a supermarket experience.

Sunday, May 24, 2009


I'm a box in a light storm and I'm coming home dead, watching the cracks in the sky. The storm is distant now.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009


Head full of secrets
But what do they say?
You’ve got the time but
I’ve got the pay

So much to do when
I’m not with you and
We get older
I want the sun, I
Want the sweet
Spot in your shoulder

I want to speak but there’s
Nothing to say
Go tell the clouds that
I’ve come to stay
I’ll save this muse for
Another day
In this cliché when
The pen’s so far away
So far away

So much to do when
I’m not with you and
We get older
I want the sun, I
Want the sweet
Spot in your shoulder

And now I feel
What I know is real
It’s right before me
There’s a mess of me
And it’s ready for you
And we’re not sorry

A caveman woke up
And he went out
Felt rain on his head
And all throughout
Wondered if this is
What life’s about
We’re all so human
Out of the drought
Out of the drought

an original song written for our band, "avian bungle," to play at saturday's battle of the bands. whoever invented is a genius.

Saturday, May 9, 2009

lyrics you should know

I'm sick, you're tired, let's dance
Break to love make lust I know it isn't
I'm sick, you're tired, let's dance
Cold as numbers but let's dance
As though it were easy for you to lead me
I could be passive gracefully
Half the horizon's gone for a skyline of numbers
Half the horizon's gone we're working the numbers
'till I'm sick
Sleep don't pacify us until
Daybreak sky lights up the grid we live in
Dizzy when we talk so fast
Fields of numbers streaming past
I wish we were farmers, I wish we knew how
To grow sweet potatoes and milk cows
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,
Where is the love?
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,
Who here is in line for a raise?
Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,
Where is the love?

Tonight your ghost will ask my ghost,
Who put these bodies between us?

-Metric, "Calculation Theme"

Friday, May 8, 2009


My arms ascend over my head, as if to at last salute the precious ground who has nurtured my balance and being for so long. As my knees release, you conveniently find the proper angle in time to maneuver your head around to watch me, though I had begged you to turn away. While you laugh, in mid-air I stop to contemplate my over-serious nature and allow a laugh, for my own sake. While I begin my descent in the next half-second, I meditate on the amount of time wasted and opportunities unnallowed in deciding to leap up and into a stuffy mattress. Well, then I wonder how a simple housefly might feel, having to spend his life in such a sorry manner of flying, feeling, stopping, and being ridiculed. I feel deep peace in knowing that I am not a mere housefly, just a young girl questioning her awkward intentions. Space breaks and the offwhite sheets strangle my senses with white and soft, the suffocating love similar to that of a new mother. No, I am not a housefly, I am the dwarf's fool, having been dropped too soon into the bowl of thick cream, drowning in an adventure of my own making. I search the covers in havoc, only to find that the more I relax a part of me in the squishy, lumpy, new-furniture-smelling, cool, delicious, sinking thing in which I have just landed, the more I find myself slipping into an even more luxurious dream.

I follow the pattern of your teeth and instantly scorn noses for being so clumsy and stifling. Your mouth smiles for me and tells me that I've got roses and May. I suddenly feel as if I have caught all the air in this world and have not a clue as to what should be done with it. I could linger, and use it all for breath to share with you. Or, I could relinquish this oxygen, throw it all back to the selfish world and become some otherworldly being, some alien force of passion. I should choose the latter, as I could never get as close to you as I desire because this clumsy body, this awkward physical state of being is a barrier against the entwining of souls. I've never felt this obsession for anything other than my brain before.